Arnie's Blog

There’s something within us that hurts when we reflect back on our lives. Sure, we had amazing moments, and unforgettable memories. However, in our moments of silence, we question:

“What is this all for?”

We all have our different ways of asking ourselves the meaninglessness of our existence. *This IS NOT an existentialism post* Whatever conclusion we come up with that’ll fulfill us the most, poses another question:

“What truly makes me happy?”

As we rubble through our memories, struggling to identify what powders concoct our happiness pill, we often realize it’s simply difficult. We can go on the oversaturated topic of how stupidly the system of schooling works in North America. You know, the same ol’ “Deciding your entire life at 18 and sticking to it until retirement at 65 (when you can truly live)”.

Although, I believe it’s not an activity, an object, or even people that makes us happy. It’s ourselves! Wow! Groundbreaking wooOoOO~ As cliche as that answer is, I believe that most of us don’t quite understand what happiness is within us means. I’ll briefly explain in a tl:dr format, and I’ll post a more in-depth version in the future.

Happiness TL;DR

The emotion of happiness, and a happy life are two different things. Happiness isn’t meant to be chased for, and counterintuitively, chasing happiness makes it less probable to feel. Living a happy life means to understand that just like any other emotion, happiness is fleeting. We can’t force ourselves instantly to be sad or angry. If you’re trying right now, I appreciate your engagement. Although, if you did attempt to cultivate these feelings, your mind may have tried to instigate those emotions by thinking of a bad memory. In that, is something fascinating.

Emotions are something that comes to us. Let me explain. If you’ve noticed, emotions are a reaction to our outer environment. Say you stub your toe, and immediately want to punch the hell out off the door frame. That situation that was manifested brought anger. Of course, through control, we don’t defile our living space. There’s a wonderful analogy that comes to mind, that may help with understanding this concept. Think of emotions as butterflies. You try to chase these creatures, but they fly away. However, if you cultivate a garden flourished with an emerald carpet of grass, colored with vibrant petals of blues, oranges, and red. Then, the butterflies come to you.

The objective of garnering certain emotions is dependent on your garden, meaning you! Focusing too much on the emotions themselves will only chase it away.

The Title

I don’t know your age or where you are in life, but I do know there’s something you can do to live the life you desire. As for me, I turn 24 in 166 days. The life I imagined myself to have at 24 is far from reality. This isn’t any productivity or motivational content, but observational. I observed myself as someone who doesn’t fit the descriptions of who I want to be. I don’t mind whatever addictions, self-destructive habits, or anything of the like that we may have. What matters most is this last question I’ll give you:

“Do you want to change?”

I do. Everyday for 166 days, I want to become to become as much of me as possible! All the ideals that parents, peers, and social media tells me what I should do and be, buried me. As a result of that, I went through my growing years accomplishing goals for everyone else. I want to be on the steering wheel of my life, so I choose to be expressive and impactful. I want to retire my parents and myself. I will escape the 9-5 and finally live a life for me and help as many people as I can along the way! Cheers to me on my 24th birthday! 166 days, here we go!